Do I need such a relationship? How to understand if you have a future with your man? How do you know if you need a relationship or not?

• Why do people need relationships?
• How to save a relationship?

This is the minimum of questions
that appears before us,
at some point in life,
about relationships with other people.

Those who are used to thinking logically tend to
weigh all the arguments "for" and "against" - consciously.

It is for such people that advice is designed:
before making a decision about
start, continue or end a relationship,
make a list of two columns
with opposite assessments of the current situation and,
after filling them out, evaluate the result.

But not all of us, and not always, are so rational, scrupulous
and disciplined.

In addition, most of the time we make decisions
based on inner feelings and motives,
on their own, not always fully understood, desires and aspirations,
even doing despite the voice of logic and reason,
getting under the influence.

And such behavior is manifested in the evaluation of relationships - especially brightly!

Regardless of "arguments and facts",
which the mind provides
people, for the most part, in this matter,
follow their feelings.

And if we get now, or hope to get in the future,
undoubted pleasure, from communication with this person,
then we give such relations - "good".

That is, we enter into a relationship only when
when we expect them to bring us something good,
pleasant, bringing joy and pleasure, and not vice versa!

Only in exceptional cases, being under the influence of euphoria of feelings,
only rare individuals are able to appreciate the imaginary "bright future",
any critical and see some "pitfalls"
on the way to happiness looming on the horizon.

They enter into relationships, based on happiness.

This is the answer to the question:

Why do people need relationships?

Also, if we, in our current relationship,
we get more from communication good than the bad
then we naturally have the intention to continue them further.

This is the answer to the question:

How to understand whether to continue the relationship or not?

And if you get more pleasant and useful in a relationship,
than unpleasant (and something unpleasant, to one degree or another,
and from time to time, inevitably, happens) then, undoubtedly, -
I want to let them continue.

But if you have serious doubts about this,
then you need, after all, to find time to assess what is happening.

You need to listen to yourself and, at the same time,
try to be the best honest!

Otherwise, such an occupation does not make any sense.

If the bowl of your internal scales,
began to lean towards "bad",
this means that soon
you will have the intention to say “no” to this relationship.

That's the way we are.
You won't write anything!

But to be a slave to your feelings
is not only unreasonable and stupid.
It is also irresponsible and sometimes criminal,
if not only your own life depends on your decision.

The most striking example is the divorce of a family.

If divorce proceedings concerns only two
For the most part, it's their own business.

They are only responsible to each other.
for not fulfilling the vows made on the day of the wedding,
and for not being able to get along together despite their original intentions.

But if there are children in the family,
then the responsibility of each of the spouses increases - many times over!
And it's clear why.

Therefore, the answer to the question

How to deal with relationships?

will be like this:

It is necessary to make a careful analysis of not only your feelings,
but also reasons why communication from the positive - at the beginning,
began to turn negative.

Then, you need to analyze and understand
to what extent these relationships useful for you personally
and if others are drawn into them, then also for them.

It is necessary to understand and understand
what can be done to remedy the situation if it is worth it.

And be sure to remember that the gap, no matter what type of relationship,
in any case, it leaves a painful mark and an unpleasant aftertaste in the soul.

Do you agree?

So why, in our complex world,
full of constant tension and stress,
still add additional negative experiences to yourself?

Let this be another argument for maintaining the relationship.

Get serious about solving this problem!
Relationships don't need to be thrown away.
Not the fact that it will be possible to find a worthy replacement for them.

On the other hand, by no means
you can't cling to those relationships,
which, for some reason, hopelessly deteriorated
and bring much more unpleasant
which, perhaps, lead to degradation and destroy you.

How to save a relationship?

Handle the issue responsibly and
to see a clear picture, as mentioned above,
try to study all the details.

And if you deal with the origins of the discord that happened,
you can't do it on your own,
You can turn to me for help.

Often just one consultation is enough.
in order to clearly understand whether it is worth maintaining a relationship!

And if it's worth it, then find the reasons
discontent and disagreements that have arisen between people,
and then neutralize them, thereby save the relationship,
to the mutual satisfaction of all parties.

Checked! :)

P. S.
Did the information provided here help you?
get answers to questions:

• Why do people need relationships?
• How to deal with relationships?
• How to understand whether to continue the relationship or not?
• How to save a relationship?

Write about it, please, in the comments.

Comments

In principle, everything is clear. When it's good, we choose yes, and when it's bad, we choose no.
It's sad when a relationship ends. And yet it is difficult to understand them. There are relationships that drag on and on and you no longer get any pleasure from them, but you can’t finish them. It's hard to offend a person.
So what to do in such cases?

Answers:
July 23rd, 2014 at 01:47 pm

Maria, you also need to analyze the situation, see the full picture of what is happening, set priorities, and then make a decision.

And if you can’t do it yourself, then please contact me for help.

I will be glad to help you! :)

Everything is very clear to yourself…but….you just can’t break out of this vicious circle….because often you don’t want to for some reason…it can be a habit and unwillingness to change everything and much more…in my case it’s just unwillingness to go to less comfortable housing when dividing property ... but living with this person is already disgusting ...

Answers:
July 25th, 2014 at 08:45 pm

Yes, Olga, you are right: ending relationships, especially family relationships that directly affect many life conditions and factors, is very difficult.
And people tend to delay making the last decision until they become unbearable, when “bad” becomes so difficult that the arrow to “no” just goes off scale.
But you should know that by bringing yourself to such a state, you are at great risk of health, not only mental, but also physical.
I think you yourself understand this.


Olga answers:
July 26th, 2014 at 13:46

Polina, if you only knew... how mentally and physically ill I already am.... and there is besides this "neighbor"... my beloved is nearby.... but... again, those damned things... but... he is far from my age.... and we can't be together... .and from this the pain only intensifies and tears everything inside .... from the understanding that time has been lost .... that what is given ... this piece of happiness is only a temporary period .... and nothing can be returned back .... if only we loved more themselves .. then ... when they were still young ... and could still create a new family and give birth to more children .... then there would not have been such a result ... ..

Answers:
July 26th, 2014 at 09:51 pm

Olga, not knowing most of the details of your situation, I can only tell you that if you are alive, then life is not over.
Today's decisions shape the future just as yesterday's decisions shape the present.
Therefore, if you want your future to be happier, you need to do something about it right now.

I liked the article very much, it is written in an accessible and understandable way. The main thing is to force them to change and look at the problem differently.
Thank you very much))) You are doing a very important job!!! It is impossible for a person to get out of depression alone, if you try, it helps for a while, and then everything gets worse. Valentina, there is only hope for such people.

Answers:
August 17th, 2014 at 11:47 am

Svetlana, thank you for your comment.
But, sorry, I don’t understand: this article answers the questions: Why do people need relationships? How to deal with relationships? How to understand whether to continue the relationship or not?
But your comment does not address this topic.
And, excuse me, what is Valentine? ..

Svetlana answers:
August 17th, 2014 at 03:41 pm

Sorry, please, Polina, I wrote too late (I mixed up my name)))) Your article helps to understand how to understand yourself - is such a relationship necessary?
I tried, using your advice, to do this, but so far nothing has worked, and I did not hope for a quick resolution of the problem that had been accumulating for many years. But your article helped me understand myself better and try to decide how to end relationships that have become obsolete, while causing as little pain as possible to others)

Answers:
August 18th, 2014 at 04:55 pm

Svetlana, please don't worry. I understand that anything can happen, especially if you are tired and therefore it is already difficult to concentrate.
And I am very glad that the advice that I gave on how to understand the relationship and understand whether to continue it or not turned out to be useful to you. Of course, one cannot count on a quick solution to a protracted problem, but when a person has been able to identify a problem for himself, this will certainly lead him to its resolution. This is the first step, without which the subsequent ones are impossible.
I sincerely wish you good luck on this path! :)

And if the relationship is without a future, but it is very difficult to end them? There were attempts ... I understand with my mind that it would be more correct to end everything and look for something else .. but it doesn’t work out. I can’t say more good or bad about them either .. on the one hand, I often worry, on the other hand, having finished everything, I worry a hundred times more .. There is no future in the relationship because he decided so. My child became a hindrance. We don't live together, but we spend all our free time together. We are 25 years old. The man in the marriage had no children and did not come into contact with them at all and sincerely says that he is afraid and does not know what will happen next and that he wants his children. I perfectly understand that there would be no problems, but I will not persuade him. It's useless there. His decisions are made only by the mind, not by the heart, and all of them are always thought over for a long time. Because of my feelings for him, I left my husband who loves me very much, the father of the child. Well, I'm not sorry. Feelings went to him. Tell me how to be?

Answers:
January 5th, 2015 at 05:10 pm

Tatyana, I'm sorry, but I can't help you in the situation you describe in the chat mode.
It is not one of those that can be easily solved, and it will not work to give one here - the only true advice.
Such situations require a careful approach, careful analysis and ... a full consultation.

In general, you described everything quite clearly and, based on this description, one conclusion suggests itself - a relationship with a man who is not ready to accept your child is really not worth continuing.
But there may be moments that you have not reflected and there is an opportunity to change something.
And if this is not the case, then the pain of breaking up a relationship through chatting cannot be removed, unlike a personal consultation.

Tatiana answers:
January 5th, 2015 at 05:42 pm

Thank you very much for the answer) I tried to ask a question on the Internet for the first time) in fact, I perfectly understand that without understanding the situation it is difficult to advise something. It just worries me a lot and it was a kind of cry for help. I often wake up with the thought of what to do, why everything happened this way. On the one hand, I accept the position of another person, he has the right to think as he wants and I don’t blame him, but on the other hand, it’s still very unfortunate that everything is so. answers:
March 27th, 2015 at 04:00 pm

Tatyana, you're right. If the relationship is spoiled and one or both of the parties have no desire to continue communication further, then there is nothing to save here. You need to accept this state of affairs as a fact and continue to live on.
You should not try to understand such relationships. You just need to leave them, having drawn all the necessary conclusions for yourself so as not to make such mistakes in the future, if they were made.

Hello. I read your article and reviews. but still unable to accept it. emotions rage. I have a family.husband. and there is a virtual friend with whom we have been communicating for a long time.
I am not going to break the family, but I am not able to refuse the second man either. relationship with him is difficult. he has a friend of whom, due to some circumstances, I know. it’s easy for him with her, but as he himself tells me, he is still drawn to me. he tries to keep me, says that he himself does not understand what is between us, does not hold and does not let go. I understand what is happening to me now. reality substitution.
but I'm so used to this man. and jealousy for that girl does not allow me to live in peace either in reality or in virtuality. now throw stones at me.. call me crazy..

Answers:
September 20th, 2015 at 04:14 pm

Tatyana, my task is not to condemn people, deciding whether they are doing the right thing or not, but to help them figure out what is happening, find the causes of current problems and get rid of them once and for all.
No one is immune from mistakes, and everyone at some point in their life can get confused in circumstances and suffer, not knowing how to get out of the vicious circle ...
Therefore, if you understand that you now need help to sort out your relationship, contact me for.
I will be glad to help you. :)

I now stand on the threshold of a choice - to continue the relationship or disperse?
We've been together for a year and a half. Few things really connect us. The laps are still hard.

His character is never a gift, although he is a good person and I love him, but he doesn’t have me ... There are many minuses, all the pluses are my dreams and illusions and affection + dependence on him + I understand both about age and about the fact that there are queues from others There are no contenders and there won't be.

Loneliness again?

It wasn't bad...but dreary, and breaking up in a state of love is like a knife to the heart.

How to stop loving Him?

Or torture both and continue this "family life"? .. And in general, it seems to me that he is using me ... (((

Answers:
April 28th, 2016 at 13:36

Anna, if the information given by me in the article did not help you to understand your relationship and understand whether to continue it or not, then in your difficult situation, I can recommend you to go through my Personal Consultation.

And then we will be able to analyze in detail everything that is happening to you now, find the causes of current problems and, of course, the way out of them.

Question to a psychologist

I am 20 years old, I am a student. I was raised by my mother, they divorced my father when I was 2 years old. From class 7, he tried to communicate with me, but it was not very important for me, I was not on fire with communication with him. He helped me with money and only because of this I kept in touch with him and nothing more .... When I met my boyfriend, I was 18, I was finishing the 1st course. When we started talking, he met with my classmate. I fell in love with him, he was with me and with her. So everything went on for half a year, he told me that he loves me and wants to be with me, but when I said leave her and let's be together. He found many reasons not to do it. I really wanted to be with him, so I endured everything, but when I realized that I had no more strength to wait, I put him before the choice of me or her. Yes, he chose me, but it was very difficult, we continued to hide, I had a constant fear that I would have problems with his ex since we were studying together, and it passed more than a year when we could live in peace and fear nothing. At the beginning of our relationship, when he broke up with that girl, as it turned out, there was another one at work, there was a situation and I found out about it, there was a scandal, he left that girl, but I could no longer trust him! Yes, I forgave him, but who is still sitting in my soul, both for my classmate and for this girl from work. He often lied to me, I struggled with this for a very long time, then he stopped doing it, he often walked with friends, everyone used him, he paid for all the parties, he really liked to draw attention to himself, but when I explained to him that these people they just use it, and they are not friends at all, he stopped walking. I was completely in these relationships, I forgot my girlfriends, friends, I wanted to be only with him, but we began to have conversations about the family, about children, this is me of course pleased. Yes, he provides for me, he can clean the room, and cook, and wash, and stroke. As a girl, of course, I do it all myself, he can only sometimes help me. We very often swear over trifles, word for word, and a scandal ensued, yes, I pay great attention to trifles, if a scandal starts, I won’t let myself be offended, and it always angered him that he was always to blame, and always tried to find my weak place, but he can’t do it, he said that I crushed him mentally, that I was stronger than him. There was a time he came up to put up first, there was a time for me, then no one came up, there was a time when we didn’t talk for weeks, but then I couldn’t stand it and started the conversation myself. Our problem is that he doesn't like to talk. If he knows that he is to blame, he will not admit his mistake, but will look for jambs in me, and not answer the questions I posed, but simply avoid answering. He provokes me in every possible way, it started with tantrums, with my tears, now it has come to the point that he takes me out and I can be the first to rush to give him a slap in the face, or somehow hurt him, he used to endure, and now he gives back. The only way I could bring him to his senses was to say that I was leaving him. I always thought that in order to solve the problem, you need to talk about it, but he does not want this, and when I leave it to chance, everything starts anew. He said he was tired of me with my conversations, he was tired, but I had accumulated a lot of resentment both for the past and for our relationship. Now I don’t know whether I love him or not, but the fact that we have now switched places is for sure. Now he loves me, but maybe I just allow myself to be loved. I’m afraid that I won’t find a better one, so I don’t know how else to save these relationships, or is it better to leave and live at least in peace ...

Tatyana, Healthy Relationships in a couple suggest mutual responsibility of partners for these relationships 50/50. Reading your letter, one gets the feeling that you take turns shifting all 100% of the responsibility to each other. If a person deceives, does not want to discuss problems, provokes tantrums - these are all ways to relieve oneself of responsibility. Judging by your letter, you have a competitive relationship - you compete in proofs of which of you is better or more right, but where is the cooperation ?! You are right that in order to build relationships you need to talk, but in order to talk you need to be a psychologically mature person. Your relationship did not start very nicely and have a corresponding continuation. I do not think that both of you are now ready to start a family, and even more so to think about a child. If you continue the relationship only because of the money, then, in fact, this will be a reproduction of your relationship with your father. If you are afraid that you won’t meet anyone better, although it’s completely unclear from the letter what is valuable in your relationship, then this indicates that you have low self-esteem and that you are ready to be content with what they offer instead of choosing yourself. Answer yourself: what is valuable for me personally in these relationships? How do I see my desired relationship? What qualities should my ideal partner have? And what should I be myself to match it? I think it will clear things up for you, good luck! Good answer 5 bad answer 0

Question to the psychologist:

I live in a small town, I'm 35... My whole life is here, my hobby, work, a young man is 5 years younger than me, he loves me, he is reliable with him, he wants a family in the future, but I was already married and don't want to go back there ! This is an eternal expectation from a partner that he will pay attention to you, routine, cooking, washing, etc. In general, one day is like another! And so I want to travel! Moreover, we are different, he is a pragmatist, a skeptic and a conservative, and I am a creative person, you know ... constantly in dreams, in flight. We live together for half a year, how we live, from quarrel to quarrel, as if I should follow the orders of my grandfather! (He just lived all his life with his grandmother, so he developed such a character). He constantly irritates me with this, I constantly want to run away, which I do, but he returns me, they say, I love you, I can’t live without you, he puts pressure on pity, and I obey. With intimacy, we are more than wonderful, but you won’t be fed up with them in life. At first I thought I was in love, but now I understand that it’s just love and I’m not ready to cook borscht for him until the end of the century! On the horizon is still constantly flickering ex-husband, wants to return, lived with him for 15 years, we are kindred spirits, but he drinks a lot, and I just can't stand it! Maybe I can go to live in a big city, find a job, so I want to live for myself, see the world, otherwise I won’t really see anything, all the beauty, for what do we live ??? But something stops me, fear. Or maybe I screwed up? I'm completely confused, people help me ... These thoughts are constantly in my head, there is no way to hide from them !!!

The psychologist Unterova Victoria Vladimirovna answers the question.

Hello, Elena! Only you can decide whether you need this relationship. But in order for certainty to appear, think about what you want in life? What are your goals? What pleases you?

If you leave everything as it is now, are you ready to live like this for many years?

You write that you have a fear, but it is quite natural, because if you decide to leave for another city, work there, travel around different countries, then this is a completely new lifestyle for you, which means new habits, a new environment. Any more or less significant changes are stressful for every person. Try to "test" yourself: imagine that right now you need to move to the same big city that you mentioned. We have to pack our bags and go out. What do you feel when you imagine it? What is more - anxiety or joyful expectations, pleasant anticipation? After all, it happens that dreaming about something, we are actually not ready to change everything. Therefore, with the help of the "test" - would you be ready to leave right now towards a new life, you will better understand yourself.

If right now there is no readiness, but you don’t want to live with your partner anymore, then think over the action plan in detail. What can you do now for yourself? Where to begin? Maybe this is a job search in the desired city via the Internet, maybe new acquaintances, both business and friendly. Make a list for yourself and follow it.

Elena, in the process of these thoughts and actions, certainty will come, just listen to yourself. And these actions are not irreversible. Even if as a result of your steps you realize that this is not how you want to change your life, new plans will appear - nothing terrible will happen. Respect your desires, live the way you want, because only in this way you can come to inner harmony.

Absolutely all couples, without exception, face problems (crises) in relationships.

Even those couples that at first glance seem to be just perfect ...

There are two options for the development of events, make an effort, work on yourself, change, develop, become better, look for compromises, etc. and so on, and also, work on your relationship with your partner so that the relationship is right, balanced, and ultimately makes sense OR = the easiest option, do not strain and leave. For most it is the 2nd option ...

Today, I will tell you about the 1st option, namely: in what cases it is worth trying to save the relationship.

In my opinion, it is worth trying to save relationships when it makes sense to save them.

Meaning is different for everyone. Below, I will give just a few examples (so that you understand (a)).

What does that mean, does it make sense?

If you feel that you still love your girlfriend / woman, or vice versa, your man = then you need to try to do everything in your power in order to establish and maintain this relationship.

By the way, here it may also be that one of the partners = is already ready to end this relationship, and someone, on the contrary, is still struggling and trying to maintain / improve them ... in this case, it is also worth trying to maintain and improve relations, because IT MAKES SENSE. In this case, I recommend to someone who is already ready to end the relationship = on the contrary, give your partner a chance, because he (or she) is trying his best, trying to establish and maintain your relationship, so I would recommend going to a meeting.

After all, think about it, you weren’t just with this person for so long. Break not build...

Well, if you have already given (a) a chance = nothing has changed = you will already know for 100% that this is the end. You will know for sure that you have done (a) everything in order to maintain this relationship.

But! If you really don’t want any of this, you don’t want anything anymore, with this person, then you don’t need to force yourself, because the meaning of relationships is to strengthen each other, not destroy.

If the relationship has no meaning, then they are not needed. Therefore, if nothing has changed, you have not corrected your problems, mistakes in relationships, then tell your partner honestly about everything and move on.

If you are well suited to each other = you have common interests, hobbies, you + - think the same way, you + - have the same worldview, you are approximately equal to each other, you understand each other perfectly, you are like kindred souls, as if the same, you are both feel = then, definitely, it also makes sense to try to maintain and improve your relationship. Because common ground = without them, no relationship can do.

Without points of contact = no serious relationship is possible in principle. And you already have them. This is your similarity, “kinship” = a rather rare phenomenon = because we are all different personalities, absolutely different, and meeting “the right” little man = quite difficult, I would say, extremely difficult, therefore = there is a huge sense to improve your relationship and save their.

If you don’t see a joint future with this person, then there’s no point in maintaining a relationship.

When there is a meaning, you see it = then it makes sense to preserve them, improve them, etc. and so on.

Worthy high-ranking personalities = units in the literal sense of the word. Hard deficit.

If you are lucky enough to meet a really worthy partner = then there is also a MEANING for establishing and maintaining relationships and you should definitely use it.

Because a dime a dozen - low-mid-ranking individuals. With which a lot of minuses, problems, shortcomings, horror, and so on. Things. And if there are other points, for example, feelings, love, sincerity, with such a high-ranking status = then it’s just definitely worth making every effort to improve your relationship and maintain it, and even more: improve together, work in all directions , improve relationships, etc. and so on..

This item is especially relevant (important) for girls / women, because. you are biologically dependent on men, a worthy sexual partner is extremely important to you, tk. a worthy man for you is the main resource in life. No. 1. After all, it is a worthy man who will be a woman and offspring: to feed, clothe, protect, take care, etc. etc., It is extremely difficult to meet a worthy man in our time. And if suddenly, your man is such = it makes sense to establish relations with him and keep them and improve them.

The same, in fact, for men. Decent high-ranking women, in our time, are also in short supply. Therefore, if you were lucky enough to meet such a young lady = it makes sense to interact with her further, provided that, of course, you want it yourself ... provided that there are other points, for example, she tries, in everything, or there are feelings, love and many other things…

When the subject of the transaction has already been implemented, and it is the children who are the subject of the transaction in the relationship = you always need to find compromises in a good way, with each other, in relationships, always!

Because children not in full-fledged families = they have much fewer opportunities than children in full-fledged families, because of this, children not in full-fledged families grow up much less adapted to the surrounding reality, respectively, and much less competitive, and, accordingly, and the chances of their survival, in this situation, are much less in comparison with children who grew up in a full-fledged family. Do you understand?

If before the implementation of the subject of the transaction = you can disperse one and all, then after the implementation of the subject of the transaction (the birth of children) = it makes sense = you need to try to maintain and improve these relationships.

When making a conclusion, remember the word SENSE, when there is a sense = you can (should) try!

1. If there are feelings, love, etc. = it makes sense to try to maintain and build relationships.
2. If one of the partners is trying to establish and maintain = it also makes sense to try.
3. For example, if you are a good match for each other, kindred spirits. = also makes sense.
4. For example, if you see a happy future together with this person… = it makes sense.
5. If the partner is worth it = worthy (th), high-ranking (th) = also makes sense.
6. If there is a joint child (children) = it also makes sense to establish and maintain relationships.
7. and many other things related to the word MEANING = when it is = it is worth it. IMHO!

Regards, administrator.

During the period of falling in love, women often do not notice a dismissive and consumerist attitude, and when they take off their “rose-colored glasses”, they are disappointed. To understand whether a girl will not receive deceit and betrayal in return for sincere feelings and loyalty, she should carefully look at the behavior of her chosen one. Special methods of psychologists will help to understand whether a man needs a girl or he only uses her.

Important! Today, taking care of yourself and having an attractive appearance at any age is very simple. How? Read history carefully Marina Kozlova Read →

Signs of indifference

There are a number of signs that indicate a man is not ready for a serious relationship. These include behaviors such as:

1. 1. He appoints the place and time of the meeting himself, when it is convenient for him. The opinion and wishes of the girl partner do not care. The rest of the time, he does not pick up the phone, abruptly ends the conversation and refers to the workload at work. No matter how busy a man is, if he needs a person, he will always listen to his opinion.
2. 2. At any time, he can change the plans of the girl without a good reason for this. He prefers to hold meetings at night on neutral territory. Men allow themselves to treat only their mistresses this way.
3. 3. The partner says almost nothing about his life and does not introduce relatives, friends and colleagues. He does not want to start communication with the environment of the new passion and her parents.
4. 4. A man is constantly dissatisfied with the behavior of the girl and expresses all the comments aloud. He may not be satisfied with the appearance, hobbies and preferences of his beloved, but he does not want to leave. The goal of a man is to lower a woman's self-esteem.
5. 5. He can quarrel, and, without asking for forgiveness, not get in touch for several days, so that the girl feels guilty.

If a man does not need a woman, he does not follow his speech. Compliments are like a performance in a cheap theater. The partner does not need to choose words to address the interlocutor - the guy does not appreciate her and does not consider it necessary to waste time on such "trifles". If the girl is completely indifferent, the partner allows himself to insult her and use profanity in the vocabulary.

When a man needs only one thing - an intimate relationship, he completely changes and surrounds the girl with simulated attention and care. You need to understand that men are more in need of physical intimacy and are ready to play performances during the period of its lack. If a man reacts rudely and inadequately to a refusal, then the best option for developing relationships is to break them.

You can check the presence of sincere feelings in a man by his care. It is enough for a woman to be in a difficult situation at least once to find out why her lover stays with her. In the absence of reciprocity, the partner will not be interested in her health and bring medicines when she gets sick. He does not care about any problems of a woman, she will solve them herself.

If a man does not need a girl, he will not use the pronoun “we” in a conversation. A person can lie, writing various legends, thinking through all the details, but he does not consider this union as a couple that has prospects for the development of relations. A man can associate the pronoun “we” with upcoming events, for example, “Are we going to the cinema tomorrow? ”, but he will not say phrases such as “When will we go to rest on the sea? or “When are we planning to have a baby? ". He knows the answer to these questions is "never" and sees no point in asking them.

In the absence of interest in a girl, a man will not get acquainted with her hobbies, family and friends. The experiences of the “beloved” are not important to him, and all conversations are connected only with what is happening at the moment. A guy can discuss a movie, but he never asks who her favorite director or actor is. If a woman starts a conversation herself, he will listen without reacting in any way, or he will change the subject. In such a situation, the girls begin to blame themselves, believing that they are overloading the man with their petty problems, but this is not so. The chosen one deceives and uses the woman.

How to understand that this is your person

How to understand that a woman needs a man?

If a girl needs a chosen one, she will feel it and the need to ask herself questions will disappear. She will be surrounded by attention and care, and no busy work schedule will become an obstacle to spending time together. A man will not behave suspiciously and secretly. Already at the beginning of the relationship, he will introduce his beloved to his parents and friends. The partner will not hide his personal life and will talk about hobbies and hobbies. The following signs indicate sincere feelings in a man:

1. 1. He listens to the opinion of a woman. If he does not agree with the girl, then he does as she asked.
2. 2. The presence of gifts indicates that the man is trying to win the chosen one, and she won his heart.
3. 3. He began to change for the better - got rid of bad habits, found a well-paid job or bought a new car.
4. 4. The guy says compliments, because he notices all the little things and details of the girl's appearance. He behaves politely and gallantly.
5. 5. In relation to a woman, a man is gentle and affectionate.

Being in love makes a guy jealous. To do this, he does not have to make loud scandals and constantly find out with whom the girl spends time. When a woman interacts with young people, a man will hug her and provide other courtesies to demonstrate that she is a couple. Some people cannot restrain their emotions in a fit of jealousy, which often leads to scandals and quarrels. This behavior is unlikely to change.

A man who cherishes a woman will not spare her money, time and mental strength. A person tries to help her in case of any problems. And he will never allow himself to offend a woman. If he did this, he will definitely ask for forgiveness. In such a relationship, the girl feels desired and at any moment can rely on the chosen one.

Many believe that a man needs time to understand whether he needs a woman, and this justifies his coldness. In fact, it is impossible to hide sincere interest, and if the feelings are mutual, the girl will definitely notice it. A woman needs a family, children and stability, and if a man does not understand this, then it is better to end such a romance right away.

If a man wants a woman signs

Is there love in the distance?

When, at the moment of talking on the phone, a girl thinks about whether a guy really needs her, she needs to realistically assess the situation and draw the right conclusions. If the acquaintance happened during a vacation in another country or a visit to an entertainment venue, the chances of creating a real long-term relationship are very small.

Lovers can be separated by such circumstances as a business trip, study or service. If a man really needs a girl, then he will not call and write less often, but will constantly share his thoughts and feelings. He will find any ways to contact his beloved even for a minute, he will not make empty promises.

A woman needs to determine who is the initiator of communication. If a man does not write or call first, then the girl's life does not interest him. He may not answer SMS and phone calls, constantly refer to his employment and come up with a lot of excuses to keep communication to a minimum.

How to understand that a male work colleague likes you

How to test feelings?

If a woman doubts her partner, then the presence of feelings in him is easy enough to check. To do this, you must take the following steps:

1. 1. Stop being interested in his life and affairs. All talk about how the man spent his time, where he was and why he didn’t call should be excluded. If a guy has feelings for a girl, he will notice such changes and start asking counter questions.
2. 2. Change for the better. You can change your hairstyle, buy new underwear or high-heeled shoes. He will definitely notice such changes and begin to wonder for whom the woman started the transformation.
3. 3. Cause feelings of jealousy. To do this, you need to ask a work colleague or friend to give you a ride home. During a conversation with a loved one, casually mention this without specifying the details - you need to give the man the opportunity to come up with the end of the story himself. It will also turn out to cause a feeling of jealousy by calls and SMS, which will constantly come to the woman's phone.
4. 4. Imaginary pregnancy. You need to tell the guy about the pregnancy and follow his reaction. If he was afraid, then about any sincere feelings out of the question.

No need to fight for relationships that are far from ideal. You should not be content with little when you can find a loving and caring man. All people are different, and in the modern world, the "consumer" attitude is becoming more common. Some women are satisfied with this state of affairs, and they are ready to spend the best years of their lives on a person who is completely indifferent. Successful and purposeful people immediately refuse such connections and create happy marriages.

After parting

Some girls want to get back together after breaking up with an ex-boyfriend. Before starting active actions, you should make sure that he has feelings. You can do this by following the signs:

1. 1. Communication. If a man continues to communicate with an ex-girlfriend, she is dear to him at least as an interlocutor. If he writes SMS and calls at least once a week, he definitely cares, and he needs the company of a girl.
2. 2. Meetings. After the termination of the relationship, men prefer to cut off all contact with their beloved. If a guy offers friendship and tries to see each other as often as possible, then he probably still loves the girl.
3. 3. Statuses and music. In social networks in the period after the breakup on the page of the former lover, who still has feelings for the girl, you can notice sad statuses and music.
4. 4. Active lifestyle. Trying to forget the chosen one, many guys suddenly start to lead an overly active lifestyle. This indicates a strong emotional shock that was inflicted by a breakup.
5. 5. Lifestyle. If a person led a measured way of life, and after separation he went "in all serious ways", then he worries, and he cares.

Before resuming a relationship with an ex-boyfriend, it is worth remembering the reasons that provoked the breakup. Mental wounds do not heal for a long time, and perhaps ex-boyfriend will not be against relationships, but it is worth thinking about their expediency.

Features of the zodiac signs

To find out about the sincerity of a man's feelings, you can refer to the horoscope. Each zodiac sign has its own characteristics and expresses feelings in different ways:

1. 1. Aries. They are impatient and cannot wait. They want to get everything at once and talk about their passions without hesitation. Aries persistently achieve what they want, but this does not mean love. This is how they treat all the women they like. In the absence of reciprocity, they will not suffer and worry, but will find a new object. In the presence of serious feelings, Aries does not rush things, but tries to create an atmosphere of silence and comfort. To conquer the chosen one, a man will be stories about how successful and strong he is.
2. 2. Taurus. If the woman liked the representative of this, he will immediately let you know about it. The man will constantly call and write SMS. Seeing his beloved on the street, he will definitely call her and embrace her. Taurus loves and knows how to care for women. Such a man will invite the girl to various social events, give flowers and sweets. The more he spends on a girl, the more important she is for him, but because of his indecision, the “bouquet-and-candy” period may drag on.
3. 3. Gemini. They are very fond of flirting, distinguished by ingenuity in courtship and unpredictability. With these men, such a feeling as boredom will be unfamiliar. They love to make fun of the girl and play pranks on her. But Gemini tend to idealize partners. After a closer acquaintance, they may be disappointed in the girl and start looking for a new perfection. In the presence of serious feelings, a man will not ridicule a person’s shortcomings and will treat weaknesses with tenderness.
4. 4. Cancer. This is a practical homebody, in whose priorities family values. Before you start dating a girl, he will find out her attitude to the hearth and housekeeping. The representative of this sign evaluates women by their readiness to fulfill his requirements. If the feelings of a man are serious, he, on the contrary, will fulfill all the wishes of his beloved. It is very important for Cancer to have a devoted and faithful partner who can strengthen his inner world.
5. 5. Lev. This is an ambitious man who does not like to hint, but speaks directly. He immediately makes it clear to the girl about his feelings. During the period of courtship, she prefers to go to expensive restaurants and surprise the chosen one with noble deeds, but this does not say anything about the sincerity of feelings. If Leo really needs a girl, then he will stop talking about his virtues and show a keen interest in her.
6. 6. Virgo. You can rely on men of this sign in everything. They like to analyze the situation and give worthwhile advice. Virgos are difficult to call for a frank conversation, and they express their sympathy with hints. They will decide for a long time whether the girl is suitable for a serious relationship. If such a man is really passionate about a woman, then he will immediately make a marriage proposal. Having heard the refusal, Virgo will try to get the attention of her partner for a long time.
7. 7. Scales. These men have a changeable mood, do not like quarrels and conflicts. They charge everyone around them with their optimism. Libra men enjoy wooing a girl and they are in no hurry to move to the next level of relationship. Such guys are afraid of responsibility and obligations. If the partner is seriously passionate, then he will begin to take decisive steps - he will introduce him to his parents and friends, and make an offer.
8. 8. Scorpio. Men of this sign have a special magnetism that attracts women to them. He is akin to a good psychologist who knows how to say words that hit right on target. He can surround a woman with attention and care, and his compliments cannot be forgotten, but this will in no way speak about the sincerity of his intentions. Scorpio really needs sex, and in order to get it, a man will go to any action. If he is set for a serious relationship, he will notify everyone that he is in a couple. Scorpio will begin to behave as if the girl completely belongs to him and will be very jealous.
9. 9. Sagittarius. Men love adventure, independence, intimate relationships are important to them. Feelings are expressed by buying expensive gifts or going to restaurants. The chosen one must be ready for various adventures that attract Sagittarius so much. If he likes the girl and he is in the mood for a serious romance, then he will try to be with her all his free time. Sagittarius will constantly tell interesting stories, amaze with his mind and erudition.
10. 10. Capricorn. This man is very distrustful of the rest and constantly seeks to double-check everything. He falls in love hard and, afraid to show his feelings, demonstrates complete indifference to the object of love. It is important for Capricorn to understand that he can completely trust the girl. If he has serious intentions, he will begin to consult with a partner and show other signs of loyalty.
11. 11. Aquarius. They are smart and charming, but prefer to show feelings not with actions, but with words. They like to talk a lot and give the girl compliments. It’s easier for Aquarius to make a sweetheart first best friend and then move on to a more serious level of relationship.
12. 12. Pisces. These are very sensual natures, which are difficult to unravel. If they fall in love, then for real. There will be violent quarrels and passionate reconciliations in the relationship. They are very touchy and in the absence of feelings of a partner they do not forgive and immediately leave. If Pisces has serious intentions, then he will be able to forgive almost everything, but his trust should not be abused.

Women are used to looking for excuses for men's "mistakes". Do not blame yourself for the fact that the partner is cold and completely indifferent. It is better to look for a person who will appreciate the girl and will not give her a reason to think about the expediency of the union.