Quotes about expecting pregnancy. The most beautiful statuses about pregnancy for expectant mothers! Statuses about pregnancy with a son from a beloved man

Waiting for the birth of a baby is an amazing state, filled with emotions. Therefore, the woman herself, and her family and friends, certainly need to post statuses about pregnancy in their in social networks. These statuses can express interesting behavior, unusual preferences and sudden changes in mood of the one who carries the baby under her heart.

Funny statuses about pregnancy

Of course, there is no humor without humor. Therefore, take note of the following statuses, which will definitely find their place on the pages of “Vkontakte”, “Odnoklassniki” and other social networks.

My friend started to get better

And they lie on the couch all day long,

She also fights with her stomach.

And that’s all because the children’s home is there.

I eat herring with chocolate,

Jellied meat with marmalade

Borscht with cake,

Cookies with radish,

Because in the stomach

I have a baby.

Some will say I'm strange.

That I don't know what I want.

I'll answer, no, that's not true,

I just want a sandwich

I'll season it with sausage

Apple and dried apricots,

And also jam, cheese,

To make the taste seem sweet.

Don't think badly

My baby just lives in my tummy.

I asked my husband for a cake

So that you don't feel sad.

But while he's going to the store,

I want cabbage.

And then I want herring,

Sweet sticks, honey.

He pleases all the time

Because darling knows

That I'm waiting for a baby.

Tastes are different.

Tears come from the desire for sweets.

And while I'm going to the store, I already need an orange.

The baby dictates the tastes to me, and then sits and savors it.

Statuses about pregnancy: beautiful, filled with emotions

Of course, women in this position are overwhelmed with emotions. Therefore, sometimes they really need to read statuses about pregnancy, which will bring tears to their eyes, and they will fully understand their condition. Please note the following options. Deep and meaningful statuses about pregnancy:

I won't harm myself while waiting for a miracle.

I will eat everything healthy,

Listen to lovely music.

I will study all the books and magazines,

Those in which they write about children.

And then I will sit quietly and listen to my little blood.

I studied all the sites,

I read poems in them,

I also learned fairy tales

Songs of sonorous souls.

And now I’m sitting, singing,

And I'm expecting a baby.

I don't dress according to fashion

And in a way that is comfortable for the stomach,

Because its resident,

I value it very much.

So that his house does not pinch him,

No elastic bands, no belts,

I'll jump into a vest dress,

And I'll go for a walk in silence.

About pregnant women in verse

Of course, statuses about pregnancy - “waiting for a miracle” - are not just short or rhyming sayings. You can write entire poems about this situation.

A leg popped out on my stomach.

Oh, and this leg wants to run along the path.

But for now it sits in me, daughter or son

Sometimes disrupting the rhythms of my days and nights.

There, in the tummy, it’s warm, and you can clearly see,

When mommy doesn't sleep,

Every second is treasured

While she carries it within herself,

Home to the most beloved creature on Earth.

Even though pregnant women are sometimes strange,

But this strangeness was given to them from above, probably.

So that evil would not be noticed, the nervous system was protected.

And when the baby appears, they were fully aware of it.

Wonder women and their behavior in verse

Pregnancy with sarcasm or spice. They are also worth paying attention to.

I bought a test today

And a red felt-tip pen,

I'll draw two stripes

To hide fears.

Let him offer me his hand,

She will call you to get married.

And a beautiful bride

Then he will call.

I got up early today

I ironed it again

All diapers, vests,

The bed that was about to be made.

I'm ironing all the clothes again,

I'm checking the clasps

Because very soon

I'll see my baby.

The training camp has been going on for a month now.

Thinking of going on a trip?

Yes, almost right

But on this trip I need:

Diapers, napkins, pipettes,

Bottles, pacifiers, rompers, booties,

Envelope, cream, powder, saucers,

Oh, how can I not dodge,

Do not forget everything that is on the list,

When will I go to the maternity hospital?

Also, statuses about pregnancy, in anticipation of the most emotional meeting, can be short.

I went to the maternity hospital, I will return as a mother.

Today I put together a package that will give me a ticket to the maternity hospital.

Diapers, nappies, pacifiers, booties, clothes of course, and candy for yourself.

Soon my husband will be walking under the windows, my mother, father and grandmother too,

Because I will give birth to someone who is dearer to everyone’s life.

Boring, dull, monotonous life will end very soon,

Just hold on.

Little, sweet, pretty little bundle,

I don’t know if my daughter or son is sitting there.

But I feel a soft, gentle body,

Which knows where to go.

Express emotions and convey your experiences. It's so sweet and sensual.

Daddy, are you awake? The baby is talking to you. I'm here next to you, in the dark, in my mother's stomach. I have your nose and eyes, I feel your caresses, my laughter will flow soon, crying, or rather, but not from grief. And while I grow up, you protect my mother. I love you all already. Wait, I'll come to you soon!

How good it is to know that another heart is beating inside you, from a loved one.

The best cargo in the world is a toddler in the belly!

Do you know what it’s like to put your hand on a pregnant girl’s belly... It’s like touching the universe... The little world of the future... It’s wonderful! This is incomparable to anything... It's like touching the universe... Touching the beautiful... The unknown...

He turned my head so much that I felt sick for 9 months...

I'm so funny... My belly button sticks out... I walk slowly and am afraid to go to the maternity hospital... I wonder if she or he is there, now I'm not alone, I'm 2 in 1...

If you are pregnant, this is temporary. If you are not pregnant, this is also temporary.

Statuses about pregnancy - Pregnancy is a unique time in a woman’s life that is worth living on a royal scale!

Bunny, you know what I thought... Come on, if we have a girl, then we’ll call him Ksyusha, and if it’s a boy, then Vlad. - WHAT? - I completely forgot to tell you! Anyway, I took a pregnancy test yesterday...

A cat is a drug of love, and it makes your tummy grow. There a little man, such a paw, will open his eyes and say “DADDY”!

The most powerful adrenaline rush is not a roller coaster, but waiting for the result of a pregnancy test!!!

God gave me an unspeakable miracle - I will become wiser, I will be a mother. Your heart beats like a butterfly inside me - I’ll wake up, smile, and it will smile. It will not betray, it will be a joy, a piece of me, a golden falling star.

What a strange bliss to realize that there, inside, perfection is growing and maturing, my angel, the fruit of my love.

You know, there is no one more beautiful than a pregnant woman... There is happiness in the eyes... There is love in the heart... There is a blush on the cheeks... And inside there is a little life...

A pregnancy test is like children's tights: if there are 2 stripes, it means ASS!

Darling, tell me 3 magnificent words that forever unite loved ones? - Honey, I'm pregnant!

You know, according to the results of one test, it turns out that you will have to live with me all your life! - What kind of test? - For pregnancy...

In the seventh month of happiness!

Sex and pregnancy are like ice cream and a sore throat.

The only thing more capricious than a pregnant woman is a pregnant man.

A man is never space. And a pregnant woman in the second half of her pregnancy is at least a closed space for another human being.

The best hairstyle is clean hair, best makeup- healthy sleep, best figure - pregnancy.

Under the moon and the sun, troubles will pass by, our home with you, bypassing it. We'll watch the sparks by the fireplace. You will become a mother, and I will become a father...

Many girls want to marry only for love, but get married solely because they are pregnant.

You know, there is no one more beautiful than a pregnant woman. There is happiness in the eyes. There is love in the heart. There is a blush on the cheeks. And inside there is a little life.

He made her a position she couldn't refuse.

I want happiness. Such little happiness. With tiny arms and legs. And with his eyes.

Under the moon and sun, troubles will pass by, bypassing our house with you. We'll watch the sparks by the fireplace. You will become a mother, and I will become a father.

Happiness is when your weight increases not from extra calories, but from the fact that your little miracle lives inside you.

Pregnancy for a woman is God’s providence, pregnancy for a man is a test of the sincerity of feelings.

The most incredible extreme sensation is waiting for the result of a pregnancy test!

And today I was kicked and jumped all night. What an interesting feeling it is when someone lives inside you.

Deciding to have a child means agreeing that from now on and forever your heart will run separately from you.

Where can you buy happiness? - Happiness cannot be bought, it can be born.

The best hairstyle is clean hair, the best makeup is healthy sleep, the best figure is pregnancy.

Nine months give new life at least three lives at once.

"Leonid S. Sukhorukov"

The day when there are three of us will be the happiest day of my life.

The woman is unique! Only in it can two hearts beat.

I know one thing, that happiness grows in my stomach. It is the most precious thing that can be.

I thought my head was spinning from love, but it turned out it was from pregnancy.

God gave me an unspeakable miracle - I will become wiser, I will be a mother. Your heart beats like a butterfly inside me - I’ll wake up, smile, and it will smile. It will not betray, it will be a joy, a piece of me, a golden falling star.

Given my taste preferences, I’m generally afraid of getting pregnant. I might want wool or machine oil. Or take over Bulgaria.

The first pregnancy is for the wedding. The second is about money. Third - they wanted a girl. The fourth, fifth and subsequent ones - let them run, it’s a pity or something.

Not all men understand the value of human life, which has just arisen in a woman, they do not protect it like a crystal vessel with clean water, they do not understand that this is a gift from God, for which God will ask them... he will certainly ask them.

Pregnancy is the result of a bodily celebration with all the consequences that flow into it.

"Igor Subbotin"

What a strange bliss to realize that there, inside, perfection is growing and maturing, our angel, the fruit of our love.

There are now two hearts inside me... I have nowhere to go from happiness... and I don’t want to go anywhere... I will enjoy it!

Nothing can be better than holding a piece of yourself in your arms.

Let's make money! Let's win love! We will achieve success! Happiness... And we will give birth to happiness!

At 9 a.m., a pregnancy test showed that my wife was pregnant, and at 10 a.m. we were already arguing, arguing about which college the child should go to.

Love is when you carry his child under your heart, and when he comes home from work he gently hugs you and kisses your belly.

Why don't you want to sleep?
Are you tossing and turning all night?
I love you, son...
Or maybe a daughter?

Truly happy is the girl who carries under her heart a child conceived from her beloved man.

It’s so wonderful to wake up in the morning with peace in your soul, with love in your heart, with light music in your head and with a tiny life inside.

There is no more valuable and treasured gift from a loved one than a new little heart beating inside you!

It’s not a sin to be jealous when girls in front of you at the pharmacy take tampons, and you buy a pregnancy test.

No guy can understand that 3 minutes are worth a lot when you are waiting for a pregnancy test to be given to you.

Best status:
– My dear dear cat, love makes your tummy grow. There’s a little paw in it that will squeak and say “DADDY.”

- Darling, please give me three magic words that will unite the hearts of lovers forever. – I’m pregnant, my love!

It's time to buy a red marker, a pregnancy test and get ready for the wedding!

– Man, are you pregnant?!! You're behaving like a capricious pregnant lady!

– Am I paying much attention to your words? - Well, no, it’s not every day that I hear from a man: “Your task is to give birth to my child!”

There is no more valuable and precious cargo in the world than the little desired toddler in a mother’s tummy.

Every peasant has known from time immemorial that in order for a goose or turkey to become fat for the New Year, it is hung in a net and force-fed. In other words, he is deprived of the ability to move and is fed for slaughter. And in 2-3 weeks it is ready.

The inscription on the maternity hospital: hey, hey, vagrants!

Selling pregnancy test... positive

I went for some fresh air to work up an appetite. And, judging by her belly, she had a good time. – A.V. Ivanov

- my bunny. - Yes my Sunshine! – and when will we have sunbeams?

In order not to feel sick from many people around you, you can get pregnant and then you will feel sick from one - Evgeniy Khankin

Envy is when you buy a pregnancy test at the pharmacy, and the girl in front of you buys tampons.

Calendar reform does not shorten gestational age. – Stanislaw Jerzy Lec

It’s so cool when your boyfriend tells you: “Dress warmly, you still have to give birth to my children!”

Desirable elastic bands are things for hooks. – A.V. Ivanov

A Catholic woman is already allowed to avoid pregnancy with the help of mathematics, but she is strictly forbidden to resort to chemistry or physics. – Henry Louis Mencken

... Girls live in a world of fears. They are afraid of never getting pregnant and afraid of getting pregnant...

The inscription at the entrance to the Chinese maternity hospital: Enough!!!

The safest way to protect yourself is with your mouth. – A.V. Ivanov

Virtual communication leads to the virgin birth and birth of children with avatar faces and nicknames. – Elena Ermolova

You don't really know a guy until you ask him to put on a condom. – Madonna

Comment: Let me clarify right away - I won’t explain! – V. Galashev

Everything about a woman is a mystery, and the answer to everything is her pregnancy.

- Darling, you will soon become a dad! - Eh, I wanted to be an astronaut...

The problem not only went deeper, but also led to an unwanted pregnancy. – Mikhail Mamchich

Trusting half is like being a little pregnant. – Alexander Kargin-Utkin

Tell me, have there been any pregnant women in your family?

Once I crossed the threshold of motherhood, I suddenly became public property, the animated equivalent of a public park. This cutesy expression You're now eating for two, my dear, perfectly conveys the fact that even your dinner is no longer your business. Indeed, when the land of the free has mastered the methods of coercion, the expression You now eat for us implies that two hundred-odd million people poking around will object if you want to eat a donut with jam, rather than a full meal of organic products and vegetables, including all five major food groups. The right to command pregnant women will certainly be included in the Constitution.

A man walks into a pharmacy: “Two pregnancy tests and two validols.”

The most interesting situation is when a woman who finds herself in an interesting position is very interested in: which of the possible candidates for paternity put her in such an interesting position? – Yuri Tatarkin

It’s time to decorate not only T-shirts, but also wedding dresses with inscriptions... For example, the inscription is very relevant: NOT... PREGNANT!!! – Vladimir Borisov

A man is never space. And a pregnant woman in the second half of her pregnancy is at least a closed space for another human being.

The female body is like a clockwork: once you start it, it ticks for nine months. – Mikhail Mamchich

The Ryaba hen saw Faberge eggs and did not envy the hen who gave birth to these eggs... - Vladimir Borisov

The entire time I was pregnant with Kevin, I struggled with the very idea of ​​Kevin, with the belief that I had demoted myself, from driver to car, from homeowner to home.

The best contraceptive is a glass of cold water: not before and not after, but instead. NN 1 Humor)

The best contraceptive is pregnancy.

Abortion, womb! palindrome) – Stepan Balakin

Dad, I'm pregnant, here's a list of suspects

A strained relationship with a condom is not a burden. – Evgeniy Khankin

Tests on are take-off green sticks. – Vladimir Borisov

You can't live like that! It's time to protect yourself! – Maya Chetvyortova

They say they have invented an absolutely reliable birth control pill. Too late. It would have been better if she had been the seed in the apple that the serpent offered to Eve. – Stanislaw Jerzy Lec

So in the heat of the moment they made me... - A.V. Ivanov

Any pregnant woman is like a Trojan horse.

The best time to study is pregnancy, because you study two in one. – Elena Ermolova

Joking statuses and aphorisms about pregnancy

N and let me be like a watermelon! I have a little one there!

WITH I started out in seventh heaven, then it was nine months of landing.

TO The only person more capricious than a pregnant woman is her husband.

N and the seventh month with happiness!

L The best hairstyle is clean hair, the best makeup is healthy sleep, the best figure is pregnancy.

"B Pregnancy is a woman’s natural state.” It turns out that until now I was in the unnatural?!

AND You can give birth to the perfect man yourself!

IN So you carry it for 9 months, then you give birth for at least 6 hours, then you don’t get enough sleep at night, and you see, he looks like DAD!!!

WITH The most beautiful thing a guy can say to a girl is: “If I ever fall in love with another girl, it will be our daughter.”

B Pregnancy and childbirth are made of beautiful girl- a gorgeous young woman!

N and nothing inspires more than waiting to meet your continuation...

P Why do you have to become ugly in order to give birth to a new creature?

I so funny... My belly button sticks out... I walk slowly and am afraid to go to the maternity hospital... I wonder if she or he is there, now I’m not alone, I’m 2 in 1...

ABOUT Some people get only experience, and from others a whole life.

D childhood ends with pregnancy. Men never grow up.

U I have a sacred cargo hidden in the body of a toddler! He lives in my tummy and eats and drinks with me. She worries about everything and counts the days until we meet!

B Pregnancy is a virus that is spread by men, but only affects women.

AND A woman carries a child - 9 months in herself, 2 years on herself, all her life in her heart

WITH The most incredible extreme sensation is waiting for the result of a pregnancy test!

AND one drop is enough if it concerns pregnancy.

B Pregnancy is the only period of time for a woman when she can finally relax her abdominal muscles and still look stunning!

ABOUT I adore my belly - the little one carries it... he lives in it like he lives in a house and is waiting for his birth...

M A man who really loves wants to change only two things in a woman... her last name and her stomach!

Z Come on, honey, a stork flew to me here and left a gift for you. You can unpack it after 9 months.

WITH The most valuable gifts are placed in an envelope... and taken out of the maternity hospital!

AND A woman is only pleased by the fatness of another woman or in the case of pregnancy.

T OXYCOSIS IS A STRANGE CONDITION - YOU WANT A MANDARNINE, BUT EAT SAUSAGE)

ABOUT it turned my head so much that I felt sick for 9 months...

G They say that happiness cannot be measured and weighed... but obstetricians succeed....!!!

R When you really grow up, you hope to see not one, but two lines on a pregnancy test!!!

AND life - it’s striped... Either one stripe, or even two...

AND Iwu slowly waiting for a miracle!

I so happy to live in this time... realizing that I am pregnant again!

WITH where happiness begins - with the stripes on my test, the ultrasound, what the heart will show, with the fact that now we are together! I'm expecting a baby!!!

M I got pregnant and got pregnant, big difference!

B Pregnancy is a miracle that happens only to women and is valued only by worthy men...

P I'm taking a pregnancy test... Positive.

WITH the most best gift from your beloved - this is another beating heart inside you!

B Pregnancy is a statement of fact!

P First pregnancy - for the wedding.
The second is about money.
Third, they wanted a girl.
The fourth, fifth and subsequent ones - let them run, it’s a pity.

E If you are pregnant, then you need to give birth. If a friend is pregnant, you should be glad that it’s not you who gives birth.

P Citizen Sidorova received a pregnancy test sentence of “18 years in prison with gradual confiscation of property.”

Z envy is when you buy a pregnancy test at the pharmacy, and the girl in front of you buys tampons.

B If you're afraid of pregnancy, don't go to kindergarten.

M A snake enters the pharmacy: “- Two pregnancy tests and two validols.”

7 months is no longer a position, but a specific pregnancy.

WITH a part cannot be bought, it can be given birth.

IN There are now two hearts inside me... I have nowhere to go from happiness... and I don’t want to go anywhere... I will enjoy it!

R I gained 20 kg during pregnancy, and he looks at me with loving eyes and considers me the most beautiful... this is love.

B Pregnancy for a woman is a trade, pregnancy for a man is a test of the sincerity of feelings...

U Knowing about pregnancy, decide on the circle of suspects in the crime...

...X ronic pregnancy...

B A pregnant woman reacts to the phrase: “Haven’t given birth yet???” just like... a dog responds to the word FAS.

P I’m gaining weight and I’m sincerely happy about it!

P Tell me, can pregnancy be considered a work injury?

WITH a part cannot be bought, it can be given birth.

M I was already embarrassed to buy condoms, and now I’m buying pregnancy tests.

D the ninth month is the longest

IN Make it a rule to terminate your pregnancy while you are still dating.

E If a woman was infected during childhood, she should be taken to the maternity hospital;
If a man is infected by childhood, he’s in the madhouse!

I I thought my head was spinning from love, but it turned out it was from pregnancy...

AND The woman is unique! Only in it can two hearts beat

TO I'll take a pregnancy test, a red marker and start preparing for the wedding!

U The ultrasound scan showed that your baby looks like a placenta.

B The pregnant ninth-grader is a pot-bellied little thing.

N and the production of one person takes on average nine man-months.

H what about the paradox of life? Why are condoms, patches and pregnancy tests in the same row in many pharmacies? It kind of tore, sealed it, didn’t help?

P apa I'm pregnant, here's a list of suspects...

N and when I was 9 months pregnant I asked my husband to paint my toenails. He denied for a long time, saying that I don’t know how and it’s not a man’s business. I got offended and went into the shower. I go out and see how he paints HIS nails with the words “WHAT ONLY PREGNANT WOMEN CAN’T COME INTO THE HEADS...”

N Every man deserves a son, but not everyone wants to give a beautiful daughter...

L The best contraceptive is pregnancy.

B Pregnancy is when you feel sick and crave salty foods. For example, you feel sick from boredom and long for the salty sea!

M lily, buy... bread... pineapples... currants... red onions... and apparently... a pregnancy test...

AND A woman's happiness is when you eat a pickled cucumber with one hand, and with the other... you flip through the encyclopedia of names and just smile.