My husband, sissy. What if the husband is a sissy? Perspectives of your traitor and henpecked mom Mommy's son pt 1 of 6

Creating strong and joyful relationships is not an easy task. Only mature, formed people who are able to take responsibility can do this. And sissies do not fall under this category at all. They get stuck in childhood, although their age can exceed 35-40 years. What then to say about very young husbands who have exchanged only their third decade. If the husband is a sissy, what to do then? The answer is to start doing the right thing. But it's just words.

How to understand that a husband is a sissy

If a boy or young man decides to marry, he must develop a mature outlook on life. This does not mean that he must immediately turn from a cheerful bully into a diligent father of the family. No, he may well maintain an easy and even cheeky demeanor. But a mature look means that the husband has already begun to take responsibility for his own decisions and hold his own independent opinion. This sissy is not enough.

Before you do anything, you should make sure that your spouse is immature. You can call him a real sissy if there are such “symptoms”.

1. The husband does not solve common family problems, but tries to shift them onto his wife and other relatives. For example, a banal situation - something from household appliances broke. Instead of calling the master or trying to fix the thing on his own, sissy ask his wife to do it. Ultimately, you may forget about the problem altogether. Detachment from difficulties is a characteristic feature of immature personalities.
2. Complaints to parents, especially to mom. Of course, heart-to-heart conversations with mom or dad are very important. Parents give useful advice or at least just moral support. But “talking” and “complaining” are completely different things. If a husband comes to his parents to complain, especially about his wife, this is not a very good signal. Only sissies do that.
3. In family relationships, the husband constantly cites his mother as an example. Again, the authority of the mother has the right to remain unshakable. There is nothing shameful in the fact that for a husband it is his mother who is the main and most valuable person. But a mature man differs from a sissy in that she does not reproach his wife for any shortcomings and does not compare her with her mother, at least openly.

Not a particularly pleasant portrait, is it? Nevertheless, such traits have to be noticed in many modern men. Mommy's sons, accustomed to being spoiled and not wanting to become adults, this is one of the main social problems now. What is the reason and what to do about it? By answering the first part of the question, we will get the tools for "re-educating" the spouse.

Because of what the husband remains a sissy

There are many reasons. The main ones are worth finding out in order to try to compensate for them. After all, if the husband is a sissy, what to do can only be understood in this way. By eliminating the cause of the immaturity of the personality, you can improve family life. It's worth trying. The husband remains a sissy for the following reasons.

1. From an early age, he was brought up in conditions of excessive guardianship. One of the most common cases is total attachment to the mother. At preschool age, the boy was constantly under the care of a caring mother. At school, he was also protected from any shocks. Having become a teenager, the future spouse is used to devoting his mother to all his hobbies ... In general, there has been no independence and isolated personal life since childhood. A strong bond is formed, which is incredibly difficult to break. Especially if the parental family lives somewhere near you. We need to get rid of this connection. And how - will be said later.
2. Lack of support and care. Various troubles between husband and wife are inevitable. Some men are used to allowing them within the family. Others seek help on the side or drown grief in alcohol. And, by the way, it’s good if a husband goes to his mother for support, and not to his mistress ... In fact, support and understanding should come from the wife herself. Problems must be solved without involving parents in it, if possible. No wonder there is a saying "dirty linen is not taken out of the hut."
3. Disappointment in his wife (or in family life in general). A man may simply not be ready to take on the responsibility associated with family life. For this reason, marrying spoiled boys who are used to getting everything easily is the worst mistake. Such a person, longing for freedom and permissiveness, will very soon begin to find fault with everything. He will begin to humiliate his wife, specially set an example for his mother. For him, this is just an excuse to quarrel and once again show how poor and unhappy he is.
4. Problems with self-esteem. Oddly enough, men love to gossip. To some extent, gossip for them is a way in their own eyes to raise their own self-esteem. A husband, coming to his mother and washing his wife's bones, tries to prove to himself and his mother how important he is. He is “the best representative of his generation”, and his wife got “so-so”. Due to complaints, due to exaggeration of the shortcomings of a woman, he begins to feel better.

These are far from all the reasons why a husband can behave like a sissy. But, perhaps, these situations occur most often. So what to do? Now we can move on to the answer to this question. There are also many methods of "compensation" for such behavior.

What to do when the husband is a sissy

There is no one way by which a husband can be immediately made an adult and mature, wean him to complain and cry. Therefore, it will be necessary, literally by trial and error, to select the tools and methods of behavior, thanks to which it will be possible to cope with a sissy. Below are the recommended actions.

1. Find out the real reason for the "childish" behavior

Correctly determining the motivation for a husband's actions is already a big step. The reasons have been described above. It remains to find out which of them most stimulates the husband to remain a sissy. We need to learn more about childhood - how the spouse grew up, whether he was surrounded by care. It is very easy to find out inadequate self-esteem or spoiledness. And these unpleasant features, in principle, are visible even before marriage. Or maybe the husband lacks support and warmth? For example, his calm confidence and feigned indifference can be a mask.

2. Find the most acceptable way to communicate with your husband

You can often see advice of this kind: "communicate with your husband from a position of equals, do not give orders, but do not try to curry favor with him." Of course, for theoretical psychology, this advice is very smart. But in practice, just a directive (commandable) tone of communication can be the most effective in communicating with sissies. If a husband is used to the fact that his mother solves all problems for him since childhood, then it will be extremely difficult to agree with him in an amicable way.

Returning to the example with the same broken household appliances. With a pampered and eternally living “under the hood” man, only one way will work - literally order him to deal with the problem. Otherwise, he, again, will try to blame everything on the woman and eliminate himself.

And the opposite situation - a spouse with high self-esteem, who does not want to recognize his wife as an equal. With him, just flattering and currying works well. He needs to show that he is the best, that he is the only one, that no one except him can cope with problems. These amuse self-esteem, this increases the attachment of the husband of the sissy to his wife. A great way to strengthen relationships and gradually move away from the parental family.

3. Maintain a good relationship with your spouse's mom and dad

For a sissy, as we found out earlier, the authority of parents is very high. And parents who do not like the daughter-in-law (daughter-in-law) can turn their dear son against her. And what will happen? Nothing good for sure...

Don't give yourself reasons to dislike yourself. If you are invited to visit, you should refuse only in the most extreme case - when you can’t go at all. It is necessary to communicate with the parents of the husband, especially with the mother, as often as possible. This does not mean that you have to live with them as one family. Naturally, isolation and boundaries must remain. But to congratulate at least by phone on a holiday, to stop by for a minute and give some kind of present (purely for attention) is not only useful, but also necessary.

4. Don't stress that you are better than your husband's parents.

Any open attacks against the parents of a sissy must be excluded. The fact that you are better than your mother must be proved not by words, but by deeds. If you stoop to insults (even if your parents deserve it), nothing good will come of it. Since the authority of mom and dad for a spouse is higher in any case, you will only fall in his eyes. The result is worsening relationships.

And, of course, do not forget that sometimes you yourself bring up a sissy. When you leave your husband without the care he needs, when you do not try to listen to his problems, do not appreciate his efforts and do not respect his parents. Trying to figure out what to do if the husband is a sissy, this will also have to be taken into account.

A sissy can be a wonderful husband

With all the shortcomings, sissies have one positive feature - they know how to love a woman. Suppose initially it is their own mother. But, nevertheless, they know the same feeling. With the right attitude, this love can be directed towards yourself. And then the spouse will become not just a sissy. He will already be caring, loving and able to share his experiences. So, do not despair too soon and curse fate. Madame Georgette guarantees that everything will work out. You just need to be patient and move in the right direction.

Who do people call sissy? Such a definition is given to a man who, in the process of transitional age, did not experience social isolation from an imperious mother. Is it possible to create with a sissy and what line of conduct should a woman follow in a relationship with such a man?

What if my husband is a sissy?

Before answering the question "what to do?" Let's figure out who a sissy is. Signs of a sissy man appear, as a rule, even before marriage, so you have every chance to recognize it before such an important step in life. The first sign: a man, on a call from his mother, leaves a woman during a date and rushes at her call. Such an incident is not the only one in which it becomes clear that the man is a sissy.

Despite such unpleasant situations, women still retain the hope that after marriage everything will change, and the man will behave differently in family life. Alas, the state of affairs does not change after the marriage ceremony, and, as a rule, a woman cannot take the mother’s place in her husband’s life. The mother-in-law will do everything to remove her from the pedestal, the newly-made wife of the son did not work out. Therefore, before you connect your life with a sissy, you should weigh the chances of creating a happy family.

A sissy man obeys his mother in almost everything

The main problem of creating a family with is that the "number one" in a man's life is his mother. It is not easy to deprive a mother of this position. All tricks can be in vain, and for many years the head of your family will be not your husband, as is implied in full-fledged families, but his mother.

Mother's sons are brought up and taken care of by women who do not have a relationship with a man. They are unhappy in their personal lives. Such women want to receive from their son everything that they did not receive from their husbands. As a rule, sissies are brought up in single-parent families where the male father is absent.. As a result of being raised by a mother who did not have a personal life, an emotionally immature man is obtained, prone to infantilism, who cannot imagine existence without a mother's guiding hand.

Starting a family with a sissy is a heavy burden. From such a man one should not expect such things as common for family life as: compassion, help, support. His mother created a beautiful son out of him, but not a man, husband, head of the family and father. The mother-in-law sees in her son's wife a rival for his attention and love, she tries to snatch him from the family, to take all his time. A woman married to a sissy is doomed to a lonely while away the evenings, because a man will spend a lot of time with his mother, because "she is alone." Any gesture of the daughter-in-law for the mother-in-law is a reason for critical statements and accusations. The mother will turn her son against his wife in order to keep him by her side by all means.

The sissy husband does not have the courage to take the side of his wife, he is afraid to "upset mom." It is easier for him to enter into a deal with his conscience than to create a conflict situation with his mother. A woman married to a sissy is often powerless to change something. When a man unites with his mother, attacks will begin from two sides, and this is a harbinger of the collapse of the family. Women who have experience of relationships with a sissy remember this period of life with a shudder.

An alliance with a sissy often breaks up, even if a woman decides not to argue with her mother-in-law.

A logical question arises: why do sissies get married? Judging by the behavior in marriage, they do not feel the need for a wife, love, sex. There are two options for the prerequisites for the wedding of sissies:

Mom wants grandchildren. If this is the reason, the mother-in-law will carry the pregnant daughter-in-law like a crystal vase. However, after the birth of the long-awaited child, the daughter-in-law will lose her right to vote, and the grandmother will take the upbringing of her grandson into her own hands.
Society pressure. Acquaintances, relatives and friends from all sides attack the sissy with a demand to marry. Lacking a strong character, a sissy gets married so that others will leave him behind.

Be that as it may, relationships in the family depend not only on the man. Perhaps the reason is not only that the man was raised this way by his mother?

Behavior of a woman in marriage with a sissy

Undoubtedly the domineering mother-in-law and the complete obedience of a man to her word is the main problem of marriage with a sissy. But sometimes the cause of disagreements in the family lies much closer. It's simple: a man behaves like a typical sissy, because his woman, whom he loves, allows him to be like that. And this is the woman's fault.

Having chosen a sissy as your life partner, be prepared to become his mother and at the same time endure attacks from your mother-in-law

Do you know why a man gets out of a comfortable bed and leaves a beautiful woman at night to the other end of the city to cook borscht with his mother? Because his mother set the standards of behavior, but his wife did not. A loving man will behave appropriately if the requirements for behavior are known to him. He will make a woman happy, because he will understand: compliance with the requirements of his wife is a guarantee. But if the wife has no rules and requirements, then whose set standards will the man follow? That's right, the attitudes of the woman who told him what she would put up with and what was unacceptable, that is, her mother.

If the mother has set standards for her son's behavior, he will follow them literally, as he fears the consequences of disobedience. He behaves this way also because the requirements of the mother do not change with time. These are simple requirements: unconditional love, boundless respect, mother's help and protection. She insists on these standards of behavior, and a man, like a caring son, will never challenge them.

This can continue until a wife appears in the life of a man with her own attitudes and requirements regarding his attitude towards her. The requirements of the wife are not complex, but they are in contact with the rules of behavior with the mother. Here they are:

A wife requires no less respect than a mother;
Wife and children - above all others and mothers, including;
Everyone in a man's social circle should clearly understand what follows from his relationship with his wife.

If a woman has not previously set such standards, then why is she surprised that a man leaves at the first call of his mother? If a woman is silent and does not express reasoned dissatisfaction with his behavior (for example, when he leaves her with children and goes to his mother to plant vegetables in the country; or when his mother allows herself to raise her voice at her, and he does not stand up for his wife), then how a man learns that his relationship with his mother violates the requirements of his wife? Speak up and be heard.

Men don't have telepathic powers! If you don't like something, tell me.

The daughter-in-law cannot compete with the mother-in-law. After all, the husband's mother is the woman who taught him to walk, knows him better than anyone else. Nevertheless, the wife can control the observance of the foundations and rules adopted in marriage. Leaving your wife and children at home in order to go to your mother’s house to cook borscht at night will become unacceptable behavior only when the woman herself begins to consider this impossible and notifies her husband about it. All that is required of a woman is to speak about discontent in a calm and prudent manner.

Is there a chance for marriage with a sissy?

Creating a prosperous family with a sissy is not easy, but possible. In addition to setting rules and standards of conduct, the following tips and conditions should be taken into account:

The family of a sissy with a self-sufficient woman is considered ideal.. The lady will not depend on her husband, and the family will not experience material difficulties when the mother-in-law asks for material help. The marriage of a sissy with a lady who is 7-12 years older than him is called successful. A man settles in a familiar environment, and his mother will be more respectful of a daughter-in-law of almost the same age as her.
The daughter-in-law must find a common language with the mother-in-law, but it is better to become her friend. Without this condition, the marriage will not last. The mother-in-law will certainly try to draw her son's wife into the struggle for the title of the Main Woman in his life, but such a path for the daughter-in-law is a fatal mistake. The mother always has a trump card in her hands, so rivalry with her is useless. The only way to save the family is to make the mother-in-law not a competitor, but an ally.
If you live in your mother-in-law's territory, then the first thing to do is to move. It doesn't matter that it will be rented living space, but living with your mother is unacceptable. Only in this way will it be possible to limit the influence of the mother-in-law on her husband.
Eliminate from your husband the wrong ideas about family life imposed by your mother-in-law. He must learn to respect his own family. Let the man know that he is the head of the family, and the well-being of you and your children depends on his decisions. Teach him to understand the consequences of his behavior.
Praise a man even for a slight manifestation of independence. Making a decision and understanding the consequences for it should not cause panic in a man, but satisfaction. Support your husband, do something together, and thus he. You can develop masculine qualities in a sissy with praise. Negative criticism will get you nowhere.
In no case do not show negativity addressed to the mother-in-law. Maintain a neutral position. Look at the situation from her point of view. The husband's mother lost the meaning of existence when the son created his own family.

What if my husband is a sissy? Make friends with your mother-in-law!

Few women enjoy life with a sissy. With such a man, they play a dominant role and manage the state of affairs. The family of a sissy and a powerful woman is ideal - he remains dependent on the decisions of the woman, and she has the usual power.

If you are not one of those women, then you need to take matters into your own hands. Women who find patience, strength and courage in themselves eventually save their marriage and create a prosperous family. A wise woman takes advantage of her mother-in-law's fear of losing her son. It’s worth waiting for a while and not trying to become “number one” in your husband’s life. Do not interfere with the communication of the husband with the mother on the scale that she needs. Having made sure that the daughter-in-law does not interfere with communication with her son, the mother-in-law will “slow down”, and then the woman will carefully and carefully take control of the situation. But do not expect that a man will become the head of the family in the general sense of this definition. It is more likely that the place of the head will remain with you.

The problem of men, who in their youth did not have a process of psychological separation from their own mother, steadily holds first places in all women's forums. After all, life with such a person turns into a nightmare: not only do you constantly encounter unreasonable criticism of everything that you do from a completely dependent person, but also the very infantilism of the "sissy" sometimes simply infuriates.

So who are these sissy And where did so many of them come from lately? Well, peaceful times lead to an increase in the number of dependent and unadapted people, whose mothers at one time took the opportunity not to let their darling son out from under the mother's skirt, from under the warm mother's wing for as long as possible. If, at the same time, the child himself did not have a sufficiently pronounced rebellious period in adolescence, when there is a separation from the mother at the psychological level and awareness of his individuality, independence, then the young man in this respect does not grow out of childhood and continues to live with his mother under a warm barrel.

Then such Lifestyle enters into a strong habit, and a person continues to live like this, until the very day, as he understands - a 30-year-old (and sometimes 40-year-old) son, who has lived with his mother all his life, it's time to marry. And this infant, an adult man with the psychology of a ten-year-old, is thrown straight into life. His nature rebels, and he wants to restore the former order, subconsciously strives for life as it was before.

He wants everything to be the way it was in parental home, Mom. He, most likely, did not want to get married at all, but "mother said." Or public opinion, traditionally important for this type of people, influenced his decision. "That's right," "because everyone does it," is a typical excuse for a sissy to start looking for a mate.

But in reality he wants to go back to his mother's nest. The style of home decoration should be the same as that of mom. All the food prepared by the wife should be like that of her mother, everything that the wife does not necessarily be studied in the mirror of comparative analysis, and disappointing conclusions will be passed by the verdict to the unfortunate wife, tired of trying to please this capricious child.

But that's not the point terrible. The main character traits can be hidden for several months of communication, and only then the woman begins to notice that sometimes this adult, it would seem, a man, behaves quite typical of a ten-year-old. He requires constant attention so that you follow him on a short leash wherever he goes. He absolutely does not want to listen to what you say, but at the same time he longs to be carefully listened to himself. He is capricious, sometimes arranges natural tantrums with screams and swearing because of mere trifles.

He is very boastful, loves flattery and loves to be admired, even if it is done falsely. He is a tyrant, always formidable for his subordinates, but shrinks into a ball at the sight of his superiors. He can act cheeky and rude, but as soon as his wife is furious at such behavior, he retreats and comes with an apology. In general, over time, an obvious fact appears before a woman in all her terrible beauty: she lives with a ten-year-old.

Most of these marriages are doomed to failure in advance, because the strong symbiosis of mother-in-law and husband is an all-destroying force that even a loving wife cannot resist. But if the feelings have not faded away yet and there is a strong desire to maintain a family union, despite all the difficulties and disadvantages of such, several ways to win back your own husband and find family happiness given in this article will help you with this.

Is a happy marriage possible?

So what if the husband is a sissy? A huge number of women around the world suffer in marriage with a man who is not able to become the head of the family, because he is still the child of the woman who raised him for herself. It is for herself and nothing else, because she is not going to let him go or share with someone. She needs it at any time of the day: pick her up from the cinema, make dumplings together, do a general cleaning in her apartment, buy new flower pots, and so on ad infinitum. And he will do all this when you need him! It is possible that at the first call he will jump out of bed, leaving you to sleep alone among cold blankets to the delight of a triumphant mother-in-law.

Sooner or later, such marriages break up, because living with a child and having children from him is a depressing picture and one can hardly see real female happiness in it.

But some wives still manage to take the reins of power into their own hands, and perhaps you will succeed. To do this, it is necessary to understand the psychology of the behavior of both, outwitting each of them.

Why does the husband obey his mother, and not you?

Psychologists often receive tearful letters in which women ask a soul-searching question. And the best advice they give in this situation is to stop fighting with the mother-in-law, because her authority cannot be undermined, and all attempts to do this will only alienate her husband even more.

So why does the husband obey her, and not you? Everything is very simple. Steve Harvey also spoke about this in his show, who answered live the questions of women on behalf of all men. A man always follows clearly established rules and standards! In a relationship, these rules should be set by a woman, ideally a wife. But if the mother did it first of all, then her interests will always be guarded to the detriment of yours, because, most likely, you didn’t even try to present your own, fearing quarrels with your husband and war with your mother-in-law.

Interesting!

Until you set your own clear rules and exercise control over their implementation, a man will please his mother, because the control on her part is so tight that he is simply afraid to disobey.

5 ways to improve your family life

What does a wise wife need to do in order to establish family life with her husband, without becoming a victim of his mother? Here are some effective ways:

1. Don't criticize his mother. Yes, it is very difficult, and in some cases it is completely unbearable to keep your mouth shut, but if you try hard, he will stop moving away from you, which will return a trusting relationship.
2. Befriend his mother. Perhaps one of the most difficult, but definitely victorious steps. Friendship does not have to be sincere, but if you play your part well, soon the dislike of the mother-in-law will turn into indifference, and she will stop talking nasty things about you to her son.
3. Become self-sufficient . Oddly enough, it is men - sissies who are drawn to strong and self-sufficient women, often much older than themselves. This is easy to explain: they are more comfortable this way, because such a wife somehow reminds them of a mother who always makes decisions herself.
4. Praise him . Try to praise him for every little thing to motivate him to do something useful much more often, and he, like a child, will be pleased with the praise.
5. Become the head of the family . Alas and ah, but those who did not find the strength to leave their sissy, must find the strength to become the head of the family, because he will never take this place. And without a captain, the family ship will break on the rocks.

No matter how much you love your husband, first you need to understand what to do if the man turned out to be a sissy and stick to the plan, because there are several undeniable facts:

• It is impossible to prove to your mother-in-law that you love her big but still small boy.
• You will always be a hindrance to her, and therefore the more resistance you show, the worse you will be.
• The husband will only believe her, even if she is wrong.

Keeping such a marriage, do not forget that the children will always take an example from the father, so there is a great chance to accidentally raise the same son, and you already have a double responsibility.

For those who are not yet married

If everything is clear with your husband, then what if your boyfriend is a sissy? The problem is that it is impossible to remake an adult man, education, like a stigma, for life. If you understand that your boyfriend is a sissy, then it’s better to think a hundred times whether it’s worth continuing the relationship with him at all, because in the future you will already become the wife of a sissy, who will be attacked by your mother-in-law endlessly.

The only chance to save your relationship is right and, most importantly, set priorities in time, explain to him what you can put up with and what you can never. And only if he accepts the game on your terms, you can think about a future joint future, but if he does not accept them or systematically breaks promises, run away from him like fire.

But what if you love him madly and can't just leave him? Well, first try to make friends with his mother, but do not forget that she will treat you as his temporary hobby, and demand attention and love for her son as from a wife. Therefore, before starting a serious relationship with a sissy, carefully weigh all the pros and cons!

Unfortunately, our life is characterized by the presence of many complexities that cause problems associated with all aspects of social relations. As a result, we are increasingly faced with problems in everyday life that are impossible to put up with and that are very difficult to solve.

It is not uncommon to hear from a friend or just an acquaintance that her boyfriend or husband is a "sissy", and it is very difficult to deal with him. Who are sissy, what to do if you are trying to build a relationship with such a person?

Despite the seeming ludicrousness of defining such a thing as "sissy" in the form of a full-fledged psychotype, experts talk about this phenomenon. There is no consensus on the reasons for the formation of this type of personality, however, there are several basic theories that will help you better navigate the way of thinking of such a man.

Incomplete family

The most important is the incomplete family, in which there is no male influence on the child during upbringing. When a boy is brought up only by his mother and grandmother, this has a negative impact on social attitudes and stereotypes of behavior. He sees how women act, trying to copy such actions everywhere, getting the wrong direction of psychological development.

Many will object that there are other men in the environment of the child who are represented by relatives or random playmates - the same children.

A single mother, especially a single mother, usually seeks to protect her son from bad things, without understanding what is bad. As a result, children spend months and years walking along the usual route “home-school-home”, unable to break out of the vicious circle.

In an educational institution, the "sissy" behaves very quietly, often not understanding the problems that his peers face.

Sometimes it happens that the father is present in the family, but his influence on the child is minimal. He can be a real earner, bringing money from 2-3 jobs, or, conversely, have a subordinate position, without having the right to vote. The result in the second case is much worse - the sissy sees that dad cannot do anything without the permission of the mother, and prepares himself for such a life in advance.

A father can be removed from education under the pretext that this is a woman's business, and he will ruin everything with his actions. Resigned, he also forms the wrong line of behavior for the child.

Overprotective mother

Another option does not depend on the composition of the family - the boy is affected only by the psychological trait of the mother's character. As a child, the "sissy" is usually subjected to the following forms of psychological pressure:

• overprotection;
• blackmail;
• aggression.

With the first, everything is clear - excessive care relaxes a person who leaves his mother to solve all the problems that exist in life for him.

If we talk about blackmail, then it is represented by the imaginary illnesses of the mother, her statements that her son will quickly send her to the grave by his behavior - such pressure quickly teaches the sissy to be quiet, inconspicuous and inactive.

It is also possible not to say much about aggression - rudeness, screams, physical violence cause real injuries to the young consciousness, which are much more difficult to cure than physical ones.

There are many options and conditions under which the "sissy" develops, but the result is the same. A man enters adult life who is socially inactive - he does not know how to properly conduct relationships, cannot properly organize his activities, and often finds solace in the small world of his hobbies.

When problems arise, he seeks to provide their solution to his mother, and tries to be closer to her. In relationships with women, the "sissy" always compares them with the person who has such a great influence on him, which often causes a lot of conflict and disagreement.

How to recognize such a character?

Despite the apparent difficulty in determining the psychotype of a person, it is quite simple to see a “sissy” in advance if you use indirect signs.

http://youtu.be/3BWkuSVIIPk

The first, and most important, is his conversation. Watch who he is talking about and in what context - such men are usually appropriate and do not mention their mother very much - especially when they give examples from their own lives. In fact, the mother is a kind of standard that they use for comparison. You can try to keep the conversation going about mom by directing the topic in this direction - a real “sissy” will immediately lay out a thousand details, not forgetting to colorfully describe her virtues.

If you are in a close relationship, look at his housing. He may not live with his parents, but the presence of the mother will always be felt. The most important parameter is the wardrobe - look at what is in a man's closet, and then offer to look at a fashion catalog or show a stylish clothing website. If a person’s taste preferences do not coincide with his current appearance, then it is likely that his mother buys new clothes for him, and he does not dare to deviate from the course set by her.

A refrigerator will give a lot of information - a large number of homemade dishes, the fullness of the space will allow you to say with confidence that you have a “sissy” in front of you, who copies the home line of behavior or simply eats dishes prepared by his mother.

While in society, put him in front of a serious choice, ask him to do a deliberately unpleasant thing - for example, in a cafe, ask the waiter to replace the dish under the pretext that he did not like it.

A man who grew up in an environment of total control or overprotection is very likely to refuse to do this, having found a thousand excuses. If put before the need, he will mumble or pretend that he has complied with your request, and will convey an invented refusal.

"Mama's sons" quite often behave capriciously, demanding a lot of attention to themselves, and also tries to bind the woman they like to themselves.

Remember that at the stage of courtship and romantic meetings, no one has obligations to another person - an adult, confident, accomplished man will calmly relate to your independent pastime, and will not throw tantrums about going to a bar with his girlfriends.

What are the prospects?

The worst thing that can happen is that you get an adult child, which is actually a "sissy". He will not become a full-fledged head of the family, and will not play the role of a male breadwinner. You will have to accept that you will have to perform most of the functions that are usually assigned to both spouses and independently engage in raising children.

You may encounter the fact that a man will be completely antisocial - he will not want to go on a trip, he will not take you to a restaurant or a nightclub, he will not go to a friendly party. It is the "mama's sons" who are most likely to get a painful addiction, which can be alcohol, gambling or computer games.

Sometimes a change of scenery has a positive effect on people of this type of character - having fallen under the influence of another woman, less strict and demanding than their mother, they become liberated and change their social role. An early age will contribute to the most simplified adaptation - at 20 years old everything will go much faster and more efficiently than at 30.

However, it is not necessary to expect that the change will be complete and comprehensive - the "sissy" will not become a protector capable of completely relieving his wife of the need to solve life's problems. In the best case, you will have to do everything on an equal footing.

There is another problem that will concern the continuation of the relationship between the sissy and the mother. You will have to endure daily telephone conversations, which can drag on for half an hour, and touch upon such problems as the nutrition of your beloved child, the work of his body.

Mom, if she lives nearby, can visit to make sure that her son is not in danger. If she finds a reason for a scandal, then you cannot avoid a long-term war in which men will also be involved. The main question will remain which side the man will take, and what he will try to do to resolve the conflict.

If open confrontation can be avoided, another difficulty will have to be solved - the “sissy” will consult with his mother, receiving absolutely clear instructions, which, most likely, will not take into account your interests.

It remains to start a conflict on your own, which can be used by your mother as an argument against you, or come to terms with such an inferior position. This can apply to all aspects of life together - from nutrition to the decision to have a child.

What to do?

Here you will have to solve two main questions at once - how important a person is to you, and how much he can change. If you feel that relationships will eventually wear you out and only lead to an accumulation of problems and nervous breakdowns, then it’s worth considering - do you really need them? When you decide to pursue your goal to the end, you need to act gently and carefully.

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"Mama's boy" does not want to solve real life problems? You need to create a situation where he will be forced to do this. Entrust him with solving cases regarding housing, utilities, and other things - a man will gradually socialize, forming stereotypes of behavior when performing certain work.

Specify the conditions of your life together - an adult must understand that if you are strong and independent, then he will not be able to lie on the couch, using your merits. The vital needs of the family should be addressed by allocating money from the general budget, and everyone should earn money for wishes.

The main thing that you have to do is to improve relations with your mother. A man should see that she approves of you, and is not against the relationship - he will transfer part of the control functions from his mother to his life partner, and this share will gradually grow. When the power of the mother over the son remains the dominant factor in determining his behavior, try to establish a three-way dialogue.

You have to let the sissy understand that he is not a little boy who cannot make decisions on his own, but his mother about the need to lead an independent life without psychological pressure.